Still Gruesome, But Just as Mediocre

Splatterhouse_arcadeflyerFor some reason, throughout the short lifespan of the TurboGrafx-16, “Splatterhouse” was often considered one of the best games on the system. However, while it’s arguably one of the bloodiest games released during it’s time and definitely paved the way for games that wanted to push the envelope of goriness, it’s boring level design, mediocre graphics, shoddy control and relative ease make it a game anyone with money in their pocket should run far away from.

While everyone will enjoy shooting demons with a shotgun or smacking them with a two by four, a-la “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan, the fun doesn’t last for very long. On top of that, the game’s graphics are simple and lack any real polish. Sure, the enemies and the game’s main character are huge compared to other titles released during that time, but the plain backgrounds and shoddy animations make the game an eyesore. Enemies plod around the screen and your character moves like he’s dancing to the Styx classic “Mr. Roboto,” lacking any character or personality that would make you want to continue playing.

Sure, asking for mind-blowing animations from an almost 20-year old 2D beat-em up is a little too much to ask, but there were plenty of other mediocre games released during the same time that did a much better job of making the character move around the screen with precision and poise. On top of the ever present graphical problems, the game’s level layout is repetitive and boring. While the game can be challenging at times, it becomes a synch once the patterns of the enemies are figured out, making the game extremely easy overall.

However, the biggest problem with the game is its decrepit control. Jumping around in the game and striking enemies with weapons is much harder than it should be. Standing close enough to strike an enemy, gamers will often find that their attacks are missing and will find it equally as difficult to make what should be routine jumps. Even for a game as old as “Splatterhouse” things like this can’t be tolerated.

Because of this, playing through the game becomes more of a chore and even anyone that was a fan of it when it was originally released will find that it has aged worse than Gary Busey.

Considering all of the game’s problems, what was never a great game in the first place has been reduced even further to point where it’s barely playable. Anyone itching to play this “classic” should be warned. The fun doesn’t last very long.

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About Patrick Hickey Jr. 13819 Articles
Patrick Hickey Jr. is a full-time Assistant Professor of Communication & Performing Arts and Director of the Journalism program at Kingsborough Community College and is the chairman of the City University of New York Journalism Council. He is the Founder and Editor-In-Chief of ReviewFix.com. He's also a former News Editor at NBC Local Integrated Media and National Video Games Writer at Examiner.com where his work was mentioned in National Ad campaigns by Disney, Nintendo and EA Sports. Hickey was also the Editor-In-Chief of two College Newspapers before he received his BA in Journalism from Brooklyn College. Hickey's work has been published in The New York Daily News, The New York Times, Complex, The Hockey Writers, Yahoo!, Broadway World, Examiner, NYSportScene Magazine, ProHockeyNews.com, GothamBaseball.com, The Syracuse Post-Standard, Scout.com and the official sites of the Brooklyn Aces and New York Islanders. His first book, The Minds Behind the Games: Interviews With Cult And Classic Video Game Developers was released in April 2018 and is chock full of interviews with legendary developers. His second book in the series, The Minds Behind Adventures Games, was released in December 2019. His third book, The Minds Behind Sports Games, was released in September 2020. His fourth book, The Minds Behind Shooter Games, was released in March 2021. The Minds Behind Sega Genesis Games and The Minds Behind PlayStation Games were released in 2022 and The Minds Behind PlayStation 2 was published in January 2023. Hickey is also a contracted comic book writer, currently penning his original series, "Condrey," as well as "The Job," "Brooklyn Bleeds" "Dem Gulls" and "KROOM" for Legacy Comix, where he serves as founder, owner and Editor-in-Chief. Hickey Jr. is also a voice actor, having starred in the 2018 indie hit and 2019 Switch, PS4 and Xbox One release, The Padre (also serving as English language Story Editor), from Shotgun With Glitters. The sequel, The Padre: One Shell Straight to Hell was released in February 2021- Hickey also served as a Story Editor and Lead Voiceover performer. He has also done narration and trailers for several other titles including The Kaiju Offensive, Relentless Rex and Roniu’s Tale. Hickey is also the lead voiceover performer on Mega Cat Studios’ upcoming title WrestleQuest, responsible for nearly 90 characters in the game, as well as Skybound's Renfield: Bring Your Own Blood, where he voices both Dracula and Renfield, as well as several other characters. He also stars in Ziggurat Interactive’s World Championship Boxing Manager 2, where he performs the VO of nearly every male character in the game. He also worked on the Atari VCS’s BPM Boy.

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