Attack at Swan Lake

curb_your_enthusiasmIf anyone was curious what taboo topics were left unturned in the seventh season of “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” then animal cruelty was another issue Larry David went for on Sunday night’s episode entitled, “The Black Swan.” That sharp sense of humor and wit that was missing from “The Bare Midriff” has returned in full force.

The episode started out seemingly simple enough with David, his cousin and father standing over the grave of his recently deceased mother. David soon discovers that in order to save money for the lettering, the father used the term “Past Away.”

David decides to call the stone mason to fix it and ends up arguing with him about Derek Jeter, who feels that Jeter is not worth the money and David, in no polite way, basically tells him to just fix the stone.

He also offers to help his cousin (Richard Kind, “Spin City”) pay for the college of the child that he and his wife (who makes awful hats which she sells to the stone mason) are trying to conceive.

This nice gesture leads to the cousin asking David if he will also pay for his wife to go to cosmetology school because they don’t even know how smart this yet-to-be-conceived baby will be.

David is furious about this because he feels the nice gesture went unnoticed.

But somehow what really infuriates him is the politics of the golf club and the length of time it takes for his cousin’s crispy onions in his breakfast. In a hurry to eat breakfast and get on the golf course, it is these crispy onions that hold him, Jeff and Marty from getting on the golf course before everyone else. Not only that, but David is sick of doing the math for the waiter’s extra tip and answers his cell phone in the dining area, which is prohibited by club rules, which ultimately leads to an attainment of a bad reputation — which is mad even worse when he causes a slower golfer so much aggravation that he has a heart attack and dies.

David feels that the real culprit was the crispy onions and even when confronted by the fact he may have caused the heart attack he is still unapologetic. According to him, the guy was a “pr***” and still is.

A day of mourning leads to an empty golf course where David is almost attacked by a black swan, which he beats to death with his golf club. He shortly discovers the swan was the cherished pet of the country club’s owner. He decides to have his three buddies help him bury it and keep their mouths shut. The guilt consumes everyone but David.

Another argument with the stone mason leads the truth to be revealed in a hysterical manner despite David’s assumption the waiter was going to blackmail him, so he left him a five hundred dollar tip.

If it sounds confusing, that is only because in David’s world, everything is not what it seems, but it is a blast watching it.

The seventh season is almost up and it has been some of the best television writing in recent years. “The Black Swan” is a classic example of what works best on this series and interesting to see how much David can pack into 30 minutes.

About Anthony Benedetto 153 Articles
I have always had a tremendous passion for the cinema. For me, movies provide a great escape. When done right, the characters and stories are something that I am instantly drawn into. Over the years, I’ve unintentionally become a movie encyclopedia that I often find myself the recipient of late night phone calls from my friends while at Blockbuster [One such conversation between the Editor of this site and the film “Redbelt” immediately comes to mind.] As far as my preferences go however, I love both the cult cinema and the classics. My love of film ranges from features such as “Amadeus” to “Sorority Babes in the Slime Ball Bowl-A- Rama.” I have a long range of film heroes as well that include, Michael J. Fox, Lloyd Kaufman, Robby Benson, Michael Caine and Jeff Bridges. On this site, I hope to teach people about cult cinema and have them rent films that they normally would not, turning you into the monster that I have become. Someday, I hope to be the star and director of my cult film, employing the old stop motion techniques used in films like “Flesh Gordon.”

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