It’s got amazing special effects, great-looking women in their birthday suits, a more than solid soundtrack and production values many B-movie horror flicks will never be close to attaining.
But somewhere along the way, “The Taint†loses you with too much mindless carnage and a plot that feels like you’re watching the 1968 acid-trip “Head,†minus the fun and clouded with dozens of fake ejaculating male genitalia. Overall, for the average film-lover, it’s something that isn’t so bad that you can’t sit through it, but it’s pretty damn close.
The plot is an interesting one, which revolves around a duo of scientists who attempt to develop a drug that increases the size of the male member. Along the way, the men of the world go crazy when the drug-prototype gets mixed into the water supply and turns the male race into a bunch of sex maniacs out to kill every woman they can get their hands on.
While it sounds great as a premise, there aren’t any real characters that you can get behind. With more flashbacks than an episode of “Family Guy,†this film is like B-movie horror meets “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.†As a result, you’re always finding out more about the characters involved and not enough about how they are going to get out of the mess they’ve created. It’s like playing a game of catch-up and never having enough time to find out what you need to so you can get on to the present and future. As a result, the film’s pacing hurts it more than anything else.
In the end, there’s no solution to the whole disaster, which essentially means that men’s love of women will ultimately be their undoing. But through all the bad acting, murder, rape and phony-ejaculating wankers, it’s hard to see that message.
All in all, it’s a poorly paced, B-movie that feels like softcore porn flick gone wrong.
At the same time, horror fanatics who desire only mayhem and guts will find something to love here. The special effects and make-up have that old-school Tom Savini look to them and are on constant display throughout. It’s funny, politically incorrect and disgusting and regardless of all its faults, it’s a penis and boob-filled gore-fest that you’ll be ashamed to love, but won’t mind watching with your friends.
It’s not for everybody and considering that, it’s hard to recommend. But for those who could care less about quality acting and desire only for horror, it’s not a bad choice for a night of scares.
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