WWE RAW Coverage: Slobberknocker Average

“I think you’re overrated,”- Michael Cole to John Cena in RAW’s opening segment.

Cole’s character is annoying. The whole “slanted” broadcaster nonsense is old but Cole had a few decent one-liners. John Cena was the one who saved the opening segment with some routine promo though, continuing to lay the emotional groundwork for this feud. But it would have been so much better if Big Show came out and cut another promo. His work last week was some of the best of his career.

The in-ring work isn’t going to sell a Cena/Show angle, but the promo can.

Makes zero sense that Show wasn’t on this week’s RAW.

Matches:

World Champion Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler w/Vikki Guerrero: Physical and athletic opener. These two match up well and early on, the match was a back and forth one. Ziggler nearly won with a Top-Rope Rocker Dropper, but Sheamus fought back and hit the White Noise and followed it with the Brogue Kick for the win. After the match, Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez attacked the champion.

Sin Cara vs. Hunico w/Camacho: Fast-paced encounter. It’s like the last six months flew by and this feud just restarted on a whim. Hunico sold his tail off here and Cara won with his Head Scissor/Drop Toe Hold Combo.

Ryback vs. Arthur Rosenberg and Stan Stansky: Wow, after their boy-band promo, you wanted them to get their asses handed to them. A massive double clothesline and a double Samoan Drop variation was all Ryback needed for the win. It’s time this guy gets some real competition. At this point, Ryback is the Brodus Clay of Smackdown, with a bit more talent. The Goldberg chants by the fans were completely warranted.

WWE Champion CM Punk vs. Kane [Non-Title]: Daniel Bryan was ringside for this match. Punk was flying all over the place through the early goings of the scrap. Kane stood his ground, but Punk kept coming hard, landing kicks and all his signature holds. Again, Kane continued to fight back, but Punk got the upper-hand after he hit his top-rope Elbow Drop. After AJ and Bryan got involved, Kane took advantage and hit the Chokeslam for the win.

WWE Tag Team Champions Kofi Kingston and R-Truth vs. Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks: For two guys who caught a massive beating last week, the champions looked no worse for the wear, aside from some bandages. Kingston hit the Trouble in Paradise for the win.

John Cena vs. Lord Tensai w/Sakamoto: Cena had to defeat Tensai in order to earn a no DQ match with Cole later in the show. Tensai was tough in the early going and Sakamoto kept it that way with some well-placed kicks on the outside. Cena stayed in the match though and in typical “You Can’t See Me” fashion, nailed his signature moves and the Attitude Adjustment on the super heavyweight for the win.

John Cena vs. Michael Cole: After Cole tried to run out of the arena, Cena had some fun. After he pulled all of Cole’s clothes off, Cena slapped him on the chest and back in a way that would have made Scott Norton squeal. If that wasn’t enough, Cole got covered in BBQ sauce and then sprayed with a fire extinguisher. Amid all the tomfoolery, Tensai nailed Cena with the Chokebomb, which almost enabled Cole to get the win. Naturally, Cena kicked out and hit the Attitude Adjustment for the win.

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About Patrick Hickey Jr. 14262 Articles
Patrick Hickey Jr. is a full-time Assistant Professor of Communication & Performing Arts and Director of the Journalism program at Kingsborough Community College and is the chairman of the City University of New York Journalism Council. He is the Founder and Editor-In-Chief of ReviewFix.com. He's also a former News Editor at NBC Local Integrated Media and National Video Games Writer at Examiner.com where his work was mentioned in National Ad campaigns by Disney, Nintendo and EA Sports. Hickey was also the Editor-In-Chief of two College Newspapers before he received his BA in Journalism from Brooklyn College. Hickey's work has been published in The New York Daily News, The New York Times, Complex, The Hockey Writers, Yahoo!, Broadway World, Examiner, NYSportScene Magazine, ProHockeyNews.com, GothamBaseball.com, The Syracuse Post-Standard, Scout.com and the official sites of the Brooklyn Aces and New York Islanders. His first book, The Minds Behind the Games: Interviews With Cult And Classic Video Game Developers was released in April 2018 and is chock full of interviews with legendary developers. His second book in the series, The Minds Behind Adventures Games, was released in December 2019. His third book, The Minds Behind Sports Games, was released in September 2020. His fourth book, The Minds Behind Shooter Games, was released in March 2021. The Minds Behind Sega Genesis Games and The Minds Behind PlayStation Games were released in 2022 and The Minds Behind PlayStation 2 was published in January 2023. Hickey is also a contracted comic book writer, currently penning his original series, "Condrey," as well as "The Job," "Brooklyn Bleeds" "Dem Gulls" and "KROOM" for Legacy Comix, where he serves as founder, owner and Editor-in-Chief. Hickey Jr. is also a voice actor, having starred in the 2018 indie hit and 2019 Switch, PS4 and Xbox One release, The Padre (also serving as English language Story Editor), from Shotgun With Glitters. The sequel, The Padre: One Shell Straight to Hell was released in February 2021- Hickey also served as a Story Editor and Lead Voiceover performer. He has also done narration and trailers for several other titles including The Kaiju Offensive, Relentless Rex and Roniu’s Tale. Hickey is also the lead voiceover performer on Mega Cat Studios’ upcoming title WrestleQuest, responsible for nearly 90 characters in the game, as well as Skybound's Renfield: Bring Your Own Blood, where he voices both Dracula and Renfield, as well as several other characters. He also stars in Ziggurat Interactive’s World Championship Boxing Manager 2, where he performs the VO of nearly every male character in the game. He also worked on the Atari VCS’s BPM Boy.

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