The daunting feeling of being anachronistic is now plaguing those who have not been privy to the fact that a stranger could greet you with a photo of their genitals.This is an example of the changing tide of how “Hook Up Culture” is infiltrating the millennial generations everyday interactions through social networking dating sites. The original purpose of dating websites have become skewed, even prompting format’s for App’s like Grindr, Tinder, Scruff & Okcupid to add the option to list “Right Now & Casual Sex” as options for what one is looking for.
Even more shocking is the amount of people flocking to these apps, “Grindr a popular gay & bi sexual dating app has over 6 million user worldwide” Study Conducted by Grindr- Queerty “More than one million Grindr users log on to the app every day and transmit more than seven million chat messages and two million photos to one another.” The notion alone of all of those photos swapping hands makes one wonder has no one taught these people what you put on the internet stays their forever?
Tinder racking in a unimaginable 9 million users worldwide after only being launched last September in the US. The rise in dating apps makes one ponder “Have we truly become so socially detached that we rely on applications for dating ? Of course using the term “dating” loosely. Just in march college humor released a skit titled “Tinderella” Mocking the trade mark picture swiping motion that Tinder is known far. Showcasing for all intensive purposes “Tinderella” looking for Prince Charming only to message back and fourth for moments to meet in a night club, head back to the prince’s studio apartment and not live happily ever after. A quick romp and they both go about their lives unaffected by the results of the their attempt at a date. “It may not end happily ever after, but it’s good enough for tonight.”- College Humor
If hook up culture has become so normalized and if the apps are seemingly integral parts of the way many people date than, do the app’s pose any issues? As with anything theres is always a catch, Through research many of the user of Grindr have exclaimed issues with racist undertones that have been prevalent in the app since its creation. Some profiles listing “No Asians,” “No Blacks” or “No femmes,” and referring to people of color as food, such as “No chocolate”, “No curry,” and “No rice.” If we are looking to the virtual landscape to find reality than we must also assume that prevalent issues in the gay community would only appear in cyberspace.
Issues are also presented in the the apps generally geared to heterosexuals.Tinder user faced with such a simple interface allows shallow hot,not hot,too short, too tall,oh he’s black,he’s too white, reactions to run rampant. The concept of becoming a match with some is abstracted the hundreds of others matches you have at your disposal that you haven’t actually spoken to.Above all else Tinder is advertised as a dating app but we all know what its for and if you don’t you’ve been left swiped. “Rule #13. Don’t use Tinder to fall in love. Its strictly for hookups.-Unwritten rules of Tinder(Huffington Post)
Theses applications that are meant to bring us together only show us more of what we are missing as a society.Gone are the days of courting and frivolous dates wondering if “Tom or Sarah” is actually into you, because now sex is always at the end of your fingertips the accessibility is astounding but what it says about us as a society few ever take notice.Sex is the most primal urge and many will do anything for it, As users can see from repeated messages from people they didn’t have the heart to block. Our urge for release surpasses our political correctness,There is no time to care who knows about your prejudice, who feels offended by your harsh words or superficial race to the most trim,ethnically ambiguous,American,Queer Cisgendered, specimen. Our seemingly “sophisticated” means of interaction only show how primal we are vying for the attention of another, back breaking positioning oneself in the best lighting for a selfie to obtain the lust of another.
In all our efforts to be authentic,we end up presenting ourselves like prized dogs being examined for worth or talent or beauty for a specific breed. Confusing lust for love, momentary intimacy for self worth in many ways we are the generation of self loathing introverts. Left over angst looking in the eyes of strangers for something that makes us worthy our constant yearning to be close with other’s yet profoundly detached binds us to artificial connections and lack luster experiences, as if hook ups are a mandated dispensary of self esteem robotic exchanges of bodily fluid.We do so blindly attributing right swipes and massive data exchanges to what makes us special.
Alas the new generations online dating is in many ways reminiscent of “Who’s Line Is It Anyway” “The rules are made up and the points don’t count!”If we are looking to cyberspace to produce mate’s we must do so fully realizing that, that person lives in reality and our interaction will only mirror the reality of the world we are living. Be it Tinder or Grindr, Scruff Or Okcupid, these are real people and our fantasies of sexual exploits become very bland when it mixes with reality. There’s nothing wrong or to be alarmed about in regards to dating apps. People just have to remember that there are people on the other end of that right swipe or “Hole Pic.” This new form of interaction is just representative of a generation of people reaching out for connection in what ever form they can get it;blindly, honestly, looking for affection. “Hook Up Culture” isn’t new we just redefined the terms and conditions.
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